Takoma Pork Spring 2006 Issue
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City Council Briefs

Spring 2006

March 29, 2006 - Regular Meeting

Resolution 2006-9, Authorizing the sale of City Council Briefs (with the option of boxers at additional cost) to raise money for the proposed gym in the Community Center. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Williams; ABSENT: Elrich, Seamens)

Resolution 2006-10, Renaming the Tooth Fairy the Tooth Gatherer in response to citizen complaints that “Fairy” demeans homosexual fairies. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Williams; ABSENT: Elrich, Seamens)

Resolution 2006-11, Designating Takoma Park as a Safe Haven for Rats and Other Vermin in recognition of their rights as sentient beings and because they are impossible to get rid of anyway. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Williams; ABSENT: Elrich, Seamens)

The Consent Agenda was adopted by City Council Members opposed to nonvoluntary celibacy. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Seamens, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Williams; ABSENT: Elrich)

Ordinance 2006-1, Authorizing the Department of Public Works to triple the number of parking spaces in Old Town Takoma Park in response to citizen complaints about lack of parking. Beginning May 1, 2006, all parking spaces in downtown Takoma Park will be for motorcycles only. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Elrich, Seamens, Williams)

Ordinance 2006-2, Authorizing the addition of “e” to add historical weight to the downtown business district, heretofore referred to as Olde Towne Takoma Park. (VOTING FOR: The Letter E, Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Elrich, Seamens, Williams)

Ordinance 2006-3, Amending the Takoma Park Code, Ch. 2, to Reflect the Name of the Municipal Complex as the “Abramoff Complex,” was accepted at first reading. (VOTING FOR: Porter, Austin-Lane, Barry, Clay, Williams; ABSENT: Elrich, Seamens)

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